When I was three and four, I went to a preschool where I had a little friend my same age named Mary Christine.  At the age of four, my parents moved me across the country and I left my friend behind.  I learned to read and write at another school and, a few years later, I realized reading and writing gave me the power to look up my friend.  I found Mary Christine and I wrote her a letter and sent her a Polaroid picture of me with my pet cat (this was pre-internet and cell phones for toddlers).   She wrote back!  She remembered me, too!  We renewed our friendship as only children can – it didn’t matter that it had been four or five years since we’d seen one another and that we were no longer four years old.  We remembered our adventures and we re-introduced ourselves and, without seeing or speaking to one another, we were friends again through the miracle that was the United States Postal Service.  

Then, one day – I think I was in the 5th grade or maybe a little younger – Mary Christine stopped writing back.  I grew churlish and kept writing her, insisting she write me back.  What had happened?  Didn’t she want to be part of the Unicorn Club my friend Danielle and I had just formed?  Write me back!  Write me back!  I continued to write her with the single mindedness of a slighted 9 or 10-year old.  Then, one day, I cam home from school and my mother was standing in the kitchen and, without preamble, she said, “Mary Christine is dead.” 

I don’t think I’ll ever forget that moment. I just burst into tears.  My mother was shocked at my distress.  She said, “I’m sorry!  I didn’t think you’d be so upset!  It’s just…it’s been so long.  You haven’t seen her since you were four.”  And all I could think was, “But she’s my friend!”  It didn’t matter that we were four.  Or eight.  Or ten.  We were friends and my friend was dead and I didn’t want her to be. 

I later learned from my mother that Mary Christine was hit by a car and her mother had thought I would stop writing her but, when the letters just kept coming, she finally had to pick up the phone and call my mother to tell her to tell me.  I never wrote again.  Now, I wish I’d written her mother a letter – sent a sympathy card – something.  I wish I could tell her I still think of her daughter, even now, as an adult woman.  That the friendship of small children is quite real.

Sometimes, out of the blue – like now – I remember her and I wonder what she would have grown up to be like.  What career she would have chosen.  Where she would have lived.  What she would have been like in high school.  If she would have had her own children.  But she is forever a little girl.

There is a saying I heard somewhere that we all die twice.  The first time we die is when we stop breathing for the last time.  The second time is when you are remembered for the last time.  I’d like to tell Mary Christine’s mother not to worry; to be happy and to go about her life; that I’ll remember her daughter until I, too, take that final breath.

My new super fast, go-to comfort food is a sort of variation on Indian Khichri.  I love it so much I have to share :
1.  Heat a bit of oil (I use coconut) in a pot on medium heat and add a tiny (less than 1/8 cup total amount) of currants or raisins, cumin, turmeric, ginger, cardamom (about 4 pods), red chili powder, cinnamon, pepper, and salt to taste and stir continuously for 40 seconds.
2.  Add 1 1/8 cup vegetable broth or water and 1/2 cup long grain brown rice and stir again.
3.  Let it come to a boil and stir once more.  Then, reduce the heat to low, cover the pot and leave it be for 20-30 minutes.
4.  Remove it from the heat and let it sit, covered, for 5 minutes,
Enjoy!

The past week has been long days on set with heavy makeup and my skin is showing the toll with redness  and clogged pores.  I went to get a (much needed!) facial and the aesthetician gave me a bunch of advice which I want to share for anyone else whose skin is sensitive to long hours, dehydration and too much makeup!  

First, Vitamin C supplements and make sure it’s Ester-C, she said, because it stays in the body longer.  You can make your own topical brightening and free-radical neutralizing Vitamin C spray but use L-ascorbic (smaller molecules, apparently, that the skin can absorb).   For a make-your-own topical Vitamin C serum recipe, I like this one: mix 1 t distilled water or rose water with 1/4 t vitamin C powder (L-ascorbic acid) and store 3-5 days ONLY (make small batches) in a dark colored bottle in a dark, cool place.

 At night, take your makeup off with jojoba oil mixed with a few drops of geranium essential oil (the geranium is good for breakouts).   I already use the oil cleanse method (I have a longer post on it here) and, for me, I mix castor oil, jojoba oil, and a few drops of rose and lavender oil but I am going to try adding geranium to the next batch.

 Last, but not least, if you feel a breakout coming on, soak a washcloth in very hot water and apply for 15 minutes (keep re-heating the washcloth if it cools) twice a day for 3 days or until the blemish is gone.  If you succumb to the urge to pick at your skin and cause damage, put on some anti-bacterial ointment both at night and in the morning until it is healed.  

Disclaimer:  I haven’t tried any of this advice yet but the aesthetician had beautiful skin herself and seemed really knowledgeable and not at all “sales-y” so I swung by the health food store on the way home and grabbed some geranium oil and some Vitamin C and I’ll be trying her advice out!