
We said we would take her and the now pretty weirded out and confused store employee said, "But you can't eat it now and we have to throw it away and it's probably dead now anyway." I could see the lobster looking around and making bubbles and I knew she wasn't dead. My significant other explained kindly, "We don't want to eat the lobster. We want to release her." The store employee was totally befuddled by us but somehow we managed to liberate the lobster from the counter. We found ourselves on the street in the middle of a very windy and very rainy night in the middle of Manhattan with a really distressed lobster. We ran home and fed her edamame (I have no clue if they're supposed to eat edamame but I felt like she needed something) and the lobster started to revive a bit and get a little more active. We cut the rubber band off her claw and she was very happy, moving it around and, interestingly, not trying to snap at us at all.
We did a online search and found out putting her in the bathtub was out of the question because fresh water is apparently lethal to lobsters. I was like, "Holy moly. We're going to have to find a way to get to the ocean." However, our very kind doorman assisted us with more online searching and we learned that the East River is salt water - it's a tidal basin and lobsters can survive there(!). Who knew?!
So, my significant other and I threw on boots and headed out into the rainy night - taking the dog with us at my insistence because I thought why not? I soon found out why not. The dog hated the rain. The lobster also hated the rain. We had the lobster (and a bunch of edamame) in a paper bag that I was basically clutching to my chest to try to stabilize because it was so windy. We found our way to the River but everywhere was fenced off and the walkways were so high above the water, we felt like to throw her down from where we were would kill or at least injure her. We finally found an area, gated in, with a bunch of fences around it that appeared to have some sort of ladder into the water down some pilings on a dock. This was when I realized an angry wet dog, squirming lobster, bag full of edamame, and a bright cherry red trench coat were not the best things to have with you if you want to scale a couple of fences, waltz past some security checkpoints (for the record: I did not sneak anywhere. I walked through and waved hello to the guards) and then climb onto some pilings and down a rusty wet ladder in the rain and wind, with a very concerned lobster in your hand. Nonetheless, we managed it. We eased the lobster into the water and she swam away. I hope the pollution doesn't do her in and that she'll be ok.
The whole thing felt pretty awesome. Way better Friday night than clubbing for sure.